Sometimes as humans we need to reassure other people that everything is ok. Be it employers, friends, or loved ones- sometimes we need to give them a more peaceful version of reality, even if that requires telling some teeny tiny white lies.
I’ve found that selective cropping is an excellent way to give others the peace of mind that they deserve. I don’t think it makes me a horrible, horrible liar per se… It just makes me… uhh… Considerate? Thoughtful? A wonderfully delightful, caring, sweet, lovable girl? Yes, all those words describe me perfectly. Also fascinatingly wise like a turtle, and kind of like a superhero tiger who can fly and also has lasers for eyes. Ok there, description of me complete. And now onto the examples of selective cropping I may have used in the past…
Text Message: Hey there! R2Dog2 is doing great! Here he is having a blast on the beach! Hope your vacation is going well!
Text Message: Everything is going smoothly! Your children are such delights, and so creative!
Text Message: Hey mom, uni is a blast! Here’s a picture of me working away. Shooting for summa cum laude!
And remember, selective cropping is not REALLY lying. After all, that cropped part was always a part of the picture! It’s more like filtering out the garbage really. Think of it as a life purifier. Come to think of it I’m kind of like a goddam volunteer hero picking up garbage off the side of the road while rescuing children from a hurricane and teaching them to speed read all at the same time.